Apa Itu Cinta?

if you ever ask yourself, "what is love?", can u honestly answer it straight away, or do you have to pause a lil while to gather all of your answers? cause i do it a lot, you know, pause to gather all of my answers whenever people ask me. but oh well, people dont ask me (alot) about that, hihi...it is just me who love to ask myself , "hey, what loves mean actually".lagi2 bila bergaduh dengan encik husband....hahaha! it is good sometimes to ask ourselves, macam refresh balik perasaan kita and apa maksud cinta dalam hidup kita sendiri. 'love' cannot be answered in one sentence, because in reality,  'love' takes more than just a sentence to be define.

and remember, setiap orang ada definisi cinta yang tersendiri. it does'nt matter what, as long as it's a good one.

***

honestly, sebelum kahwin, perasaan cinta itu hanyalah nafsu semata. maksudnya macam, nak dia ada dengan kita sentiasa, nak tengok muka dia hari2, nak dengar suara dia hari2. kalau tak dapat tu semua, dapat tengok gambar pun jadi la. well, itu definisi cinta untuk remaja. oh well, i've been through that era ha ha ha so i know how the teenage girls feel.

but now lepas kahwin, cinta yang i ada untuk suami i adalah jauh lebih greater that what i felt for him masa zaman remaja dulu (tak boleh la cakap zaman bercinta sebab sekarang pun bercinta jugak....ha ha ha). betul la orang cakap kalau love tu is undefined.

sebab really susah nak cakap dan susun dengan kata-kata. afterall i'm not a good writer pun. kihkihkih..

***

husband i orang cakap, bukan lelaki romantik la, but maybe romantik in his own way. dia bukan yang kalau i post something on facebook and 'like' for that instant, even worse bila i tanya, "b, u tengok tak status i kat fb?". "tak..". tu je dia jawab. luluh kan hati? padahal status tu untuk dia. tapi i kan bodoh, dah tau nak dia baca hantar la private message, whatsapp ke ape..tapi oh well perempuan, suka la jalan jauh sikit nak bagitau isi hati. ha ha ha...sekali bukan dia perasan pun. padan muka.

kadang2 jealous jugak ada kawan lelaki upload gambar wife and anak2 and stated there "my cinta hati" "nyawa dunia akhirat " la etc etc. tapi tiba2 at one point, "OMG geli la pulak..." sebab hello, obviously la semua sayang bini tapi kadang2 jealous la jugak. ha camtu la kan perasaan perempuan. entah pape kan and unpredictable.

tapi tiba2 i bersyukur plak encik husband tak camtu...ha ha ha that what makes him different from any other man than i've known. kalau tak same la die dengan lelaki lain kan.

***

he wont tell the world how much he loves me. maybe he don't love me?err...i don't know. but i just can pray and hope yang at that moment bila dia terima akad nikah tu, he will loves me for as long as we live.

but then again, after sometimes, only then i realize, being married was not about being happy and mushy2 and all that, but it is more than that.one, marriage is when we accept 'the commitment', a promise to make our other half happy. dalam erti kata lain, kahwin adalah bertujuan untuk membahagiakan orang lain. seronok ke kalau kite je bahagia dan orang lain terseksa. no right? terutama sekali bahagiakan suami i la. lepas tu follow by anak2, mak bapak sedara mare dan sebagainya.

seeing our husbands happy, his family happy, and family kita happy  dengan kehadiran kite, is what matter most. lagi2 bila dah ade sophea ni, we can see how much we are meant for them.

secondly, marriage is about understanding and tolak ansur. marriage is when two people become one. maksudnya, apa sahaja yang berlaku dalam rumah tangga tu, husband and wife la peneraju utama dalam menyelesaikan masalah tersebut. kite jangan harapkan suami je, and suami jangan harapkan isteri je. tak boleh macam tu tau. kalau nak buat perangai macam tu, lebih baik jangan kahwin, kite settle masalah kite sendiri.

tapi obviously dah namanya suami is the king of the house, banyak kata muktamad adalah dari dia. so kita isteri ikut je la. kadang2 kite rasa macam, "eiii bodohnye die nak buat camtu...", tapi trust me, at the end of the day, sebenarnya apa yang suami kita buat tu betul. entah la Allah nak tunjuk ke ape, tapi tibe2 ade perasan macam, "eh???betul jugak kan die buat camtu..". ha ha ha....

tapi having him around the house adelah yang terpenting.

macam i cakap, dia bukan reti tunjuk kasih sayang die kat i. well, maybe ada la a few here and there, tapi tak cukup bagi perempuan pentamak macam i.

maybe dengan cara dia vacuum hall i memalam buta, and vacuum sofa2 i tu menunjukkan dia sayang i, dia taknak isteri die penat2 seret2 vacuum berat tu all around the house.

maybe dengan cara dia lap2 kepala katil kitorang and lap2 tv punye meja tu menunjukkan dia sayang i, dia taknak isteri dia terbongkok2 lap meja sebab isteri dia tak berapa kuat sangat sekarang.

maybe dengan cara dia cuci toilet kitorang tu, menunjukkan dia sayang i, dia taknak isteri dia jatuh dalam toilet ke ape. tapi i nak dia tau i enjoy cuci toilet dengan i walaupun i hanya spray2 air kat wall dengan lantai je and dia buat kerja memberus.

haihhh...

kadang2 i sedih je tengok dia buat semua tu. macam i ni tak mampu pulak nak buat kerja2 tu. memang tak mampu pun sebab penat. hahahaha..... kalau tunggu i buat seminggu sekali, takpun sebulan sekali. mesti u all tak tau kan, i selalu je kena marah kat rumah tu sebab malas. eh bukan malas, suka buat kerja bertangguh. kikiki....

and i banyak main around the house. macam kalau encik husband cakap ape, ade je yang i nak lawan. ade je nak menyampuk. pastu kena marah. duhhh....encik husband tu tak boleh relax langsung, nak serius je. tau la pegawai. kat rumah pun kena pegawai ke??? prffttt!!

ok la. i nak sambung buat entri lain. mood nak update konon. *gelaktutupmulut*